Friday, September 22, 2006

Afraid

I am afraid, I don't want to fuck this up. I don't want to be wrong again. Oh, lord don't let me be wrong again. I can not take one more blow. I am arfaid of getting hurt again. Yet not taking this chance might hurt more. I don't know what do. I want some rule to play by, as long as you follow the rules of the game you won't get hurt. I am afraid if being wrong, what if I don't feel what I think I feel. Is the chance worth the risk? I wish I could have someone tell me what to do, someone who knew what we both felt. I want someone to tell me wether or not I'll get hurt now. Do I dare to take this chance when I don't have Bunny, Danna, Vera, Cheryl or Thomas here to pick up the pieces and give me a hug. I am so afraid. And the question running through my head is, does she feel this way too?

4 comments:

Tiger said...

Derek: First tone, which is the one my keyboard can't write.

Tiger said...

And all I hear inside is a voice yelling at me, "Stop being stupid! Of course she doesn't like you, you're gonna get hurt again!" and then the voice is adding in a tone full of comtempt "Why should she?"

I hate that voice, yet it hasn't been wrong any of the times it told me something similar..

God I need to go out and do poi to clear my mind..

Anonymous said...

she? lesbian now?

Tiger said...

Nope, Bi.
have been for a long time..