There are two thing I want to talk about in this post people and feeling redundant, yeah, as you might have guessed, this is me being 'slightly' emo. Well, deal. Or simply don't read.
People,
had a talk with a freind from Flekke yesterday. She was down because that ther new freinds in her post-Flekke life seems fake and superficial. I have been lucky not to have the same expirience, but that might be the crowd I hang out with. In my expirience, geeks are less superficial than non-geeks. I think this comes from that we have accepted to be outsiders, we take pride in it even, we don't try. So we are not afraid of talking about issues that might be considered stupid, private, weird and so on by 'normal' people. It might also have something to do with the group of people who go to Smith. Lastly I think it has something to do with me. I simply stay away from people I see as superficial and fake.
Feeling Redundant,
sometimes I feel that people don't need me, not unwanted or hated, just not needed. I know they don't really need me, they'll get by without me. They will have just as much fun if I am there or not. In those moments I need to be alone, to curl up in a corner with a cup of tea and music and just be alone. I don't know what it is that makes me feel that way, I can't explain it, it has been with me as long as I remember. And my solution have always been to escape. I go for a walk, make myself tea or go camping.
And lastly, I am making a playlist for myself, a playlist of my life, the songs I have so far are:
Wishmaster - Nightwish
Wish I had an Angel - Nightwish
Ever Dream - Nightwish
Replica - Sonata Arctica
Behind Blue Eyes - Linkin Park
Dream On - Aerosmith
Eg Ser - Bjørn Eidsvåg
The Bards Song - Blind Guardian
It's My Life - Bon Jovi
Bad Day -Daniel Powter
Holding out for a Hero -Frou Frou
Jesus Christ Superstar - Jesus Christ Superstar (Murray Head version)
Det handler on å leve - Kine Hellebust
Turn the page - Metallica
Fuel - Metallica
Engel - Rammstein
In the Summertime - Mongo Jerry
Higher than hope - Nightwish
Hero - Nickelback
Photograph - Nickelback
Find my way - Paperboys
Wish you were here - Pink Floyd
Everybody Hurts - REM
The Worlds Greatest - R.Kelly
Time to Burn - the Rasmus
Supreme - Robbie Williams
Instant Pleasure - Rufus Wainwrigth
Hallelujah - Rufus Wainwright
If anyone else have ideas or comments about this project, or soundtracks they want to add, plaese comment
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1 comment:
I wouldn't say that because we don't try - as geeks - to not be outsiders, that it makes us less superficial. As it tends to, I think it polarizes - makes some people super-superficial, and some rejective of superficiality.
And, perhaps, next time that you feel you are redundant/not needed, do something random - go grab someone, have tea, share with them a book, etc. Maybe if you break the pattern that'll break the feeling too.
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