Yes, I have been stealing tea from Cheryl again, this time "Lipton: Iron Buddha Tea". The funny things is, it does not really matter what sort of tea I drink because I pollute it so much with sugar, we're talking 3-4 table spoons here. I am getting sick again, two of my room-mates is currently ill. I am only surviving on migrene painkillers and tea and repsils for my throat. And I am planning to go bed when I am done with this post. I have had a lovely non-working with school day. I have spent the day working on darkwings, I think I can have it up by Sunday, sleep and watching OC. Yeah I know, blame Cheryl.. I am also hooked to Firefly for those of you who know it, that is thanks to Bunny, she seems to be feeding almost all of my addictions lately, chocolate, RPG, water pipe and Firefly.
Seems like all my friends are stressing about grad dinner and who is going with who. Weird, how much things suddenly matter, it is really all about appearances. I am getting slightly sick of it. Slightly sick of this mask I carry all the time, even among my closest friends. It is all about hiding all the insecurity and let others only see the happy face, because after all we don't want them to worry, do we? Maybe some of them, some of you, know, have been able to piece together the puzzle. Yesterday a friend of mine from home asked a question I really not wanted to hear; "So, have you found someone?" (First of all, I am not sure what she means, someone to share my life with? Or simply sleeping with someone?...)and this led to a nasty realization, I really don't have anyone special, not in any of the senses of "found someone". But as Thomas said "Tonje, you're digging a hole, don't", well, thanks for those words, I am digging the steps I need to get out. But what did I answer her, "I am getting an education first." It is all about appearances
2 comments:
Dont worry..At least appearances matters less in Uwc than here in US..Grad. will be fun(and really sad when you start walking back)no matter what..Because noone actually cares about with whom they went.So,chill out;)
And try not to dig out so much..If the others dont dig while asking a quest.,dont dig while you answer;)
Digging holes... digging holes. I used to live in hole Tonje. Did I ever show you what I wrote about my hole?
Holes are evil, and slippery, and hard to come out of. But as soon as you flip them upside down, they stop being there. They become some stupid tunnel above and behind you, and you can keep going. If you ever wish for help to flip your hole (tehehe, note the referance) I'll be happy to be there, extending my hand...
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